The broken leg

On the 21st of  January I was heading to work and slipped on my stairs, as best I can tell I did a twist and buckle. My leg was underneath of me and I threw it out, I noticed that my foot was looking a little weird. Jason was standing in the house, when I told him I think I broke my leg. Then I decided maybe it is not broken just sprained so I gently tried to touch my foot down, which resulted in me feeling a bunch of crunching.

Jason took me to St. Luke and unfortunately our ortho doc is not taking any new patients because he is leaving, so I was transferred to Kalispell. I was a direct admit, went to CT Scan and then up to my room. I was having a hard time laying still in CT scan because I was hurting and so the tech taped my feet together. Dr. DuMontier came in and so did one of his assistants that night and told me the plan for surgery in the morning. The whole time I kept thinking did I really break my F-ing leg? You have got to be kidding me and to this day  I still feel this way.

When I was at St. Luke they had not been able to start an iv in me because I was dehydrated from having the flu the night before. So I was given two shots of demerol. At Kalispell they got an ER nurse to start an iv and I asked to be put on iv fluids knowing that I had been dehydrated and would be NPO. My pain was pretty well controlled and I was sleeping relatively comfortably when I twitched and woke myself up. That hurt like hell at that point it was 4:30 in the morning and I had to get some iv pain meds. The staff was awesome and I really appreciated them.

When I went to the OR the staff was very nice wishing me happy unbirthday when I made the statement that for a lot of people birthdays stop at 29 but I will be more than happy to turn 30. I was really nervous in the OR, I was also trying to see my CT Scan pictures or x-rays of my leg, but without my contacts could not see much. Surgery went well, I was told I have a rod in my tibia and screw in my ankle. I stayed on Sunday night and went home Monday afternoon. I have to be non weight bearing on my right leg for probably eight weeks. The first day I walked with a walker and came home with crutches. Man I am regretting being out of shape crutches are hard work.

Things at home have been ok. I have had a lot of pain and it is getting a little better. Jason and I have figured out how to do a bath/shower which definitely helps because I was feeling so gross. I slept on the couch for the first few days and have tried to sleep in my bed but I get one good sleep for a couple of hours and then I have a really hard time getting comfortable. I think I am headed back to couch because for some reason I sleep a little better on the couch.

People have been so supportive of me and friends from work have dropped food by which I really appreciate. My work has said when I am released I can do light duty at least part time. Of course I am stressed about money, but luckily my Grandparents helped me out.

On Tuesday I was slipping and stepped down on my right leg which made it hurt a lot but it is feeling better. The psuedo splint/cast I have is really heavy and pulls on my knee a lot which is where I have a lot of my pain. My knee is where the main incision is and it is still pretty swollen. I have two smaller ones on the lower inside of my knee.

Today was my first day out of the house, I had something I had to pick up from the post office. I was nervous but did ok, although walking in the post office was a lot further than I am used to. It was really nice to get some fresh air!

I am so incredibly grateful for Jason! He has been amazing through all of this. When I can walk and get things secured I definitely have to do something for him!

Recurrent nightmare

Tonight Jason and I watched Knight and Day with Tom Cruise and Cameron Diaz. There is a scene where Cameron Diaz is in the backseat of the car and there is no one to drive the car. This is basically the premises of my nightmare that I have had so many times. Watching this scene reminded me of the dream.

In my dream somehow I end up in the back of the car and all of a sudden realize there is no driver, as the car is speeding along I am stuck and must get in control of the car and get in the front seat.Of course I am panicking and don't know what to do. I used to have this dream a lot. The only thing I can think of is feeling like my life is out of control, but I really don't know. I do not know the last time I had this dream, I think it has been awhile.

Montana

When I met and started dating Jason he told me he wanted to move to Montana. I didn't object and kept it in the back of my head.  In May of 2010 maybe even Memorial Day, we drove out here to visit his Aunt Molly. I loved it. The area Molly lives in is a valley has  the Mission Mountains on one side. We came back a couple of times over the past two years and realized more and more this is exactly what we want.

I was having a really hard time at my job, I was stressed and felt really unhappy, there were many awesome times and I have some amazing co-workers but something had to change. For months before we moved, I looked at houses and jobs, Missoula is similar in price because of U of M, we didn't want to move to Montana to live in the city. A couple of  housing job opportunities came up but did not work out. I kept looking and found a clinic job at St. Luke and sent an application as well as wrote any open RN positions.  I was called less than 48 hours later. I was in the middle of my stretch on and made plans to come over the next week on my days off. I interviewed for my current job in the hospital and the clinic job. The clinic job would have been a sweet deal M-F no holidays, but somewhere I have grown really accustomed to having a four days off, it makes it easier to go home. Also the clinic paid less, which was a big pay cut. The hospital job felt right, it is what I know. I loved the director of nursing and had my fingers crossed. She did tell me three other people interviewed and I am so glad I got the job. Jason drove over and we looked at a house in town. The house in town was so much bigger than the Lake Tapps duplex and we told the landlords we were interested. I got the call on Tuesday offering me the job, later in the day the landlords called us and asked if we were still interested. We got set to move in two weeks, which flew by.

I get asked why move here, why leave, a lot? I had this sense that I should. I really didn't want to keep waiting and in five years have the shoulda, coulda, woulda's. Jason and I want to have a family and not raise them in the city. We want to have horses, chickens, and a garden. We want to own land. When we have come here it feels right. There are so many things that I love here.

Is Montana perfect? No. There are many things I miss, my girlfriends and proximity to our families is hard. I miss the morning after work coffees, nursing school girl get togethers, and many other things with friends. I also miss Asian food, there are a couple of restaurants that we have found and they fill a space, so be forewarned when I come home I am probably going to be craving some Asian. The grocery store in town closes at like 9pm, the grocery store in the town I work in is open a little later. I miss Safeway in every town. There is a Safeway about 30 minutes away, it is more expensive and I go there sometimes. I love the weather, I love the people, I love the traffic, attitude, and I really love my new job.

 This is our house, with one of our two huge maple trees. In the Fall it was awesome!

 From the highway the Mission Mountains. They  take my breath away daily!

 One day Jason went hunting with his uncle. I went back to bed at his Aunt Molly's. When I woke up a couple of hours later there was a foot of snow! It was so much fun! Everyday I keep hoping for more!

A frozen tree in my yard, over the past couple of weeks we have had really cold temperatures and freezing fog. From the freezing fog the trees have been amazing. I took some pictures when Jason and I went on a walk the other day but didn't get all of the trees I wanted and am hoping for more freezing fog so I can post more. It looks like snow, except the trees become so accented. Every leaf and twig just stands out.

Zip lining in White Fish!

One of the girls at work was talking about wanting to go zip lining up at Big Mountain, in White Fish. I heard about this and thought it would be really cool. I looked at the http://skiwhitefish.com/ website and found out about zip lining. It was off-season and in fact the last weekend of the season to go. I made a reservation and was so excited. I picked the six zip line tour. On Saturday morning we dropped the dogs off at Molly's and headed up north. The drive around Flathead Lake was really nice. White Fish reminds us of Leavenworth.

The first zip line was short just long enough to practice the positions, I really don't remember the second zip, to get to third we had to ride the chair lift which made Jason very nervous. We hiked about a quarter mile up to the number three which was the longest and highest. I loved it. Number four was right by number three it was also high and long! I loved the rush and wish we could have stopped to take pictures while on the line. Five and six were short and fast but really fun. I can't wait until my friends come over and I can do it again.

I have always loved the sensation of flying, whether it was swinging as hi as  I could go at the creek, or doing all kinds of flips on the bars in at the Rose Valley playground, or even diving. Ziplining gave me the flying sensation.



I have pictures I will come back and attach these.

Chicago National Teaching Institute for the American Association of Critical Care Nurses

Nicole and I on the bus with Chicago in the background

My work picked me to go to an amazing conference in Chicago. I learned so much, and had a wonderful time. I have never been to anything like that before and couldn't believe how much there was to see and learn. I was torn between critical care classes and mentoring/leadership classes.  The group I went with had a lot of fun. One of the fun things we did was a double decker bus tour where we toured Chicago. We got off at the Navy Pier and had lunch. I thought that was a lot of fun. Chicago is really interesting city. I was expecting May to be warm and one day it was but it was actually chilly and windy. The park in the middle of the city is so cool, I can see how people love that area. The Buckingham Fountain was also very incredible famous from Married with Children which I dislike but still really cool!

The conference sponsors a fun night, and this year they sponsored a night at The Field Museum which was really cool. I was so excited to see Sue the first T-Rex skeleton ever found. I knew Jason would be so excited so I got pictures and a magnet. There was a mummy exhibit which was really cool and creepy. Part of me doubted the realness of the mummies but then there was one that was unwrapped, and it was a real skeleton.There were also a lot of really cool things there!
I was so excited because one of my really good friends who I used to work with Kari lives in Chicago and she came with us to the Museum with me and I was so happy to finally see her!
I couldn't believe how much stuff I came with reps wanting you to buy stuff, vendors giving away stuff, learning materials. It was awesome but required an extra suitcase. 

Kari, Nicole and I !

The Stuff

There were classes I wanted to go but didn't make it. I couldn't believe how tired I was after the conference. We stayed at a really nice hotel but I was really surprised at the stuff they didn't include. They wanted $10 a day for a gym and $20 a day for internet, no breakfast. For the amount of money that was paid for our rooms I couldn't believe how little came with the hotel. Maybe I am not used to fancy hotels and that is what happens. One really cool thing there was moving being filmed at the hotel and we got a picture with Kelsy Grammar. I stand by the fact that taxi drivers are psychopaths and should have their licenses revoked. We had two of the scariest rides of my life. Ayo one of the nurses from the ICU told the driver to slow down. It was he and Nicole's first ride and they were terrified.

Year in pictures

A photographer friend on facebook is doing a 365 of pictures, she has posted pictures of her kids, family, friends etc, I love the idea and really want to do one, I've been meaning to work on it unfortunately with school, work schedule, and all the craziness that has ensued,  I am really behind, however, I am going to work on it. I have lots of posts to catch up on. So be paying attention for many more posts because this is something I don't want to fail on.

This is one upcoming post, my trip to Chicago for the American Association of Critical Care Nurses National Teaching Institute It was amazing!

 Another preview is the wedding I was just in Pittsburg! It was one the best weddings i have been to and I am so excited to share about the week. This adds to my collection of 27 dresses....

Aunty Lala

 This is an old post I just never got around to publishing it....
This past week was amazing I got to spend it with my nephew and sister. My sister went into labor on Saturday and I got the call in the evening on Saturday and left work for a family emergency. I arrived at the hospital at midnight stayed for a couple of hours and came back on Sunday after he was born. My sister and brother in law choose to just have them in the room. My brother in law had to leave for his job on Sunday night and unfortunately was going to be gone all week which gave me the opportunity to stay with her and help her. We haven't spent time together in a really long time so it was so nice.
Will is a really good baby, he is sweet and cuddly. I loved watching him and his funny facial expressions. My sister and I agree one of his best is when he's sad and he does this sweet pouty face.
Reading Will Harry Potter, he was crying during a funny part when something was happening to Dudley, I looked at Will and said, "No Will this is a funny part, Dudley is getting what he deserves." This caused Maya and I to laugh our identical jiggly poof laugh. At one point she was nursing and I made her laugh, she said, "This isn't jiggly poof this is jiggly boob."

At the hospital Will found his thumb and started sucking. It was amazing to see a two day old baby with such dextrity even if it was accidental. As he has no control he quickly pulled it out and literally threw a baby fit temper tantrum because he was so frustrated. He would be frantic trying to get his thumb back in his mouth, sticking fingers, fists in. It was so amazing to watch him attempt, he managed to do it one or two other times but we quickly learned that he needed something to soothe himself. Maya did some research and gave him the binky depsite her best efforts to prevent it.

When we took Will for a second weight and bili check I was going to take his picture, he totally posed and raised his eyebrows, this became one of my favorite pictures.

I was totally affected by Maya's hormones, during this week and had sympathy hormones.

When Maya showered I took the time to tell Will all about his Mom and how wonderful she is. It was amazing to see my little sister become a Mom, she is amazing. I loved watching her with Will. How sweet and caring she is. Will is all boy. Almost everytime we changed him he would end up peeing all over the place. At one point i had him on his side as I was wiping him and looked up to see pee by his shoulder and on the pad.. Boys will be boys I guess.
I was outside cleaning my car and Maya came to the door to tell me how he was having the biggest poop and it was really funny listening to this tiny boy make so much noise.

Aunty Lala came from Maya when she couldn't say Michaela. I will be Aunty Lala or Aunty Mic. One night we were laying in bed talking and I told Will on his fourth birthday I will buy him a puppy. I was talking to Maya and can't wait until Will is old enough for the three of us to go to Disneyland (it's a tradition for an aunt and mom to take the kids.)